[Intro] I reckon you ain't familiar with these here parts You know, there's a story behind that there saloon 20 years ago, two outlaws took this whole town over Sheriffs couldn't stop 'em Quickest damn gun-slingers I've ever seen, got murdered in cold blood That old saloon there was their little "home away from home" They say the ghosts of Bad and Evil still live in that tavern And on a quiet night, you can still hear the footsteps of Slim Shady and Royce da 5'9"
[Verse 1] [Eminem] I don't speak, I float in the air wrapped in a sheet I'm not a real person, I'm a ghost trapped in a beat I translate when my voice is read through a seismograph And a noise is bred, picked up and transmitted through Royce's head Trap him in his room, possess him and hoist his bed 'til the evilness flows through his blood like poisonous lead Told him each one of his boys is dead I asked him to come to the dark side, he made a choice and said
[Royce] Who hard? Yo I done heard worse, we can get in two cars And accelerate at each other to see which one'll swerve first Two blind bandits panic whose mental capacity holds That of a globe on top of nine other planets Kissed the cheek of the Devil Intelligence level is hellier than treble peaking on speakers in the ghetto Dismissal, I'm not a fair man, disgraced the race of an atheist Intercepting missiles with my bare hands like a patriot One track sliced without swords, I buried the Christ corpse In my past life when the Black Knight mounted the white horse And stay over-worked, it's like the Nazis and the Nations Collaborating attempting to take over the Earth
'[Chorus] [Eminem] Cause this is what happens when Bad meets Evil And we hit the trees til we look like Vietnamese people He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Seagal Above the law cause I don't agree with police either (Shit, me neither) We ain't eager to be legal So please leave me with the keys to your Jeep Eagle I breathe ether in three lethal amounts While I stab myself in the knee with a diseased needle Releasing rage on anybody in squeezing range Cold enough to make the seasons change into freezing rain (He's insane) No I'm not, I just want to shoot up and I'm pissed off Cause I can't find a decent vein
[Verse 2] [Royce] The disaster with dreads, I'm bad enough to commit suicide And survive long enough to kill my soul after I'm dead When in danger, it's funny, actually my flavor's similar to a waiter Cause I serve any stranger with money I spray a hundred, man until they joint chains While slipping bullets at point-blank range like they was punches Piss on a flag and burn it, murder you then come to your funeral Service lobby and strangle your body to confirm it Whipping human ass, throwing blows, cracking jaws With my fists wrapped in gauze, dipped in glue and glass I'm blazing MCs, at the same time amazing MCs Somehow, MCs ain't that eyebrow-raising to me From all of angles of us, flash a Mack loud enough To cast a avalanche and bust till volcanoes erupt
[Eminem] I used to be a loudmouth, remember me? I'm the one who burned your house down, well I'm out now And this time I'm coming back to blow your house up And I ain't gon' leave you a window to jump out of Give me two fat tabs and three shrooms And you won't see me like fat people in steam rooms And when I go to hell and I'm getting ready to leave I'mma put air in a bag and charge people to breathe
[Chorus] [Royce] Cause this is what happens when Bad meets Evil And we hit the trees til we look like Vietnamese people He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Seagal Against peaceful, see you in hell for the sequel (We'll be waiting) See you in hell Wall Street, Royce Da 5'9", Slim Shady See you in hell for the sequel (bye bye) Bad Meets Evil, what? (till next time)
[Outro] And so that's the story when Bad meets Evil Two of the most wanted individuals in the county Made Jesse James and Billy the Kid look like law-abiding citizens It's too bad they had to go out the way they did Got shot in the back coming out of that old saloon But their spirits still live on till this day Shhh...[spits] wait, did y'all hear that?